A lot of people have asked me, why Australia?
One of my goals had always been to travel. Driving across the U.S. with my best friend was one of the best experiences of my life and it gave me just a taste of how much this world has to offer. It also led me to the Pacific Northwest, a place I quickly fell in love with and in those mountains felt I belonged. Towards the end of 2015 I had my heart completely shattered and left in utter despair. I was so betrayed and heartbroken, I knew I needed to do something drastic for myself in order to move on.
And so, I packed up my life in Portland and hopped on an airplane to discover a whole new side of myself and this world that I had always dreamed of. As terrifying as it was, at that moment I knew I desperately needed and deserved it. I came to a point where I wanted to fill my life up with love in a different way. To build upon and strengthen the love for myself no outside person could break. To build a love for this world I already deeply had, but clearly just needed a life crisis to realize that when I feel I have nothing, I still have the world inside and ahead of me.
Since moving to Australia, I have been in many situations that tested my strength. I failed at some and persevered higher than hoped for in others. However, when I took a step back I realized that before I even moved to Australia this was exactly the pattern of my life and everyone’s lives. A roller coaster of success and failure. Remembering this in times of struggle has helped me remain strong. Remembering that while this may hurt right now, at some point I will succeed again. If you are not failing you are not learning. If you are doing everything right, something is wrong.
Everything that is happening to you right now is supposed to be happening. It may take time to realize why this struggle in your life needed to happen, but at some point you will be able to connect the dots. Even when doors are closing, it is the perfect opportunity for you to search for an open one. To explore your personal evolution. A bittersweet farewell.
Because this one door in my life had slammed shut, another one became wide open. If it were not for this, I may of never had the pleasure of melting over the most vibrant sunsets above the Indian Ocean in Australia, swimming in a cove surrounded by rock formations in emerald waters in Thailand, looking into the eyes of an elephant and feeling true happiness and satisfaction of waiting for this moment almost my entire life, diving to the ocean floor in Koh Tao and looking at a clown fish face to face, riding on the back of a motorbike through Bali feeling like a queen, drinking for free all night with my best friend/my sister at a club we stumbled upon in Bangkok on stage with the DJ’s, mentally preparing myself for the Full Moon Party on a boat hopping from island to island getting goosebumps listening to music that made me feel alive, getting sung to by the happiest Balinese boys playing guitar and drumming on a bucket and truly feeling how happy they were brought joyful tears to my eyes.
The struggle, ahh what a blessing in disguise.
I have been proved how huge this world is and how many different people there are with problems very similar to your own, or much worse. If you ever feel alone, you are not. Travel a little bit 🙂 Whether it be next door, down the road, in a new neighborhood in your city, a different state, a different country or continent. Someone is out there that feels you and has been through what you have, maybe even seeking exactly what you have to offer.
I have learned patience and that love is out there in the form of many different people, places and things. This world has so much to offer and you have the power to see it if you choose. You do not need a partner in order to feel true love. A partner is just another form of love. The most important form of love is within yourself. Find it. Discover what makes you happy and fill your life with it.